Sunday, September 13, 2009

Sometimes Love Is A Battlefield - But It Doesn't Have To Be

I heard this song "Battlefield" by Jordan Sparks on the radio and like the lyrics. I of course give a hat tip to Pat Benatar's classic Love Is A Battlefield. This has me thinking about the concept of why we "fight" for love and relationships. Sometimes incompatible people are locked in a battle of wills and broken dreams. Other times this could apply to working through an addiction, either your own or being helpless to witness another's decent into madness. Or speaking of could also be a mental disease or defect. Perhaps it's a Romeo & Juliet scenario where outside instigators are throwing obstacles at you left and right.

Maybe it's our own inner demons that we are fighting for as we've been discussing indoctrination tactics that keep women subjugated to false concepts are varied and deeply ingrained. The tie that may bind (and the subsequent chains that may shackle us) is some concept of love that we have. Maybe we think certain people and concepts are worth the fight. At some point though we must realize that the one person and concept we should love the most must be ourselves. This may run concurrent with a spiritual practice but I think even in that situation it's still a relationship and we have to be fully present to have the most fulfilling engagement. Being distracted, pulled into opposite directions, dealing with warring factions (either internal or external), wrestling with adapting concepts that work for us as individuals and being positive above all takes a lot of mental/physical/emotional capital. We cannot run on empty lest we stall in the side of the road.

Isn't it time for many of us to step forward boldly and declare that we will live our best lives, not one of getting by? If you're already there perhaps you may want to reflect on how you got there and where else you want to go to continue.
Don't try to explain your mind
I know what's happening here
One minute, it's love
And, suddenly, it's like a battlefield

One word turns into a
Why is it the smallest things that tear us down
My world's nothing when you're gone
I'm out here without a shield - can't go back, now

Both hands tied behind my back for nothing, oh, no
These times when we climb so fast to fall, again
Why we gotta fall for it, now...

I never meant to start a war
You know, I never wanna hurt you
Don't even know we're fighting for
Why does love always feel like a battlefield (2x)
Why does love always feel like a battlefield (2x)
Why does love always feel like

Can't swallow our pride
Neither of us wanna raise that flag, mmm
If we can't surrender
Then, we're both gonna lose we have, oh, no

Both hands tied behind my back for nothing (nothing), oh, no
These times when we climb so fast to fall, again
I don't wanna fall for it, now...


We could pretend that we are friends, tonight (oh)
And, in the morning, we wake up, and we'd be alright
'Cause, baby, we don't have to fight
And I don't want this love to feel like a battlefield (2x)
Why does love always feel like a battlefield (2x)
I guess you better go and get your armor
(repeat to fade)

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1 comment:

Unknown said...

An economist will say that people make rational decisions based on a cost and benefit analysis. This makes sense when someone is shopping for an Ipod or a lap top. However a behavioral economist will say that most people don't make rational decisions most of the time.

Let's take it to the next level, it was Carl Von Clausewitz who asked officers what are the goals of a particular war. Once that is considered, they had to consider the cost and benefits of the reason for that war (Ironically, officers and political science majors all over the world are asked to read Clausewitz's On War but rarely seem to apply it).

While I dislike to compare love to war, Clausewitz' approach is tremendously applicable. Is fighting for a particular relationship worth a fight? if it is, how far are we willing to go...?