- Be careful about who you give your support and time to.
- We need to stop celebrating the individual pursuits of blacks as if it's something that automatically uplifts everyone.
- You should find out if these black male (actors, athletes, music artists, politicians, etc) are willing and able to uplift women like you.
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Lessons African-American Women Can Learn From Watching the Terrell Owens Reality Show
So a brief breakdown of this scene. Owens has signed with the Buffalo Bills. He's in Niagara Falls with one of his employee/friends. She'd booked a room at a B&B and they messed up the reservation by putting them in the same room. This is the scene where they retire for the evening. He has two very attractive black women who serve the gatekeeper/policing role on this show. Officially they're his PR. As you watch the show you see them complaining about the women he gravitates towards and his reply that they have no lives of their own.
I've watched four episodes and am glad these women are Executive Producers because it means they're at least being compensated. Unlike so many other black women who fill these roles for a mere pat on the head - if that. This guy has no exposure to a black woman with our "typical" hair texture - which tends to be fragile - hence the need for a head scarf. He seems to have no intention of doing so either. Which is his choice. It's revealed that he cheated on his fiancee so even her appeal was not enough to guarantee his fidelity.
Notice how his friend points out that his dating trends are limited to white and "exotic" women. He doesn't date women who look like her. This is where I react and not because I think black men belong to black women but because of the apathy and disregard that has become the norm. It's so one-sided where we are rejected for no reason at all other than the poor attitude of these men. His underlying disdain is so obvious. He doesn't value black women as equals.
There isn't anything we can do about it - or should try to do about it actually but WAKE UP. If the role was reversed and it was black women exercising their rights to date and bed all the non-black or "exotic" men they wanted black men (and some black women who don't want us to have choices) would be howling. Like this poster at The Black Snob who has no verifiable account to trace back to them but is complaining about Black Women Empowerment bloggers who "constantly talk about black men" and "push mating with white men". Ha! The lack of reciprocity and blatant hypocrisy is what infuriates me.
I loved her reply to him though how any man she's with would notice her quality as a mate and not hold wearing a scarf against her. Even Anthony Bourdain knows what a doo-rag is used for. Are you paying attention ladies?